Making Happiness May 9, 2019
I was recently asked how I made a life of happiness for myself. I think the key to happiness is peace of mind, and I feel I have found a way to be enduringly happy - despite the circumstances of my life at any particular time, because everyone, no matter how emotionally, intellectually and spiritually mature, experiences difficult and problematic life events at some point - with three strategies. However, it should be said that these strategies are only possible because, at the most fundamental level, I love myself, and I know that my truth and my desire are valuable, worthy, and in need of protection.
Can you live happily without a Spiritual life? Oct 17, 2018
I was recently asked this interesting question. Because it is my understanding that we are actually spiritual beings having a temporary human experience, thus we are all living a spiritual life, whether we are conscious of it or not.
Overcoming Bitterness Oct 1, 2018
Bitterness arises from a sense that things should be otherwise. The means by which we gain any idea of what should be is many and varied, including most significantly social conditioning as well as past experience, but as with all human experience it is all purely subjective. If the circumstances and events that are the cause of our bitterness cannot be changed, the only thing left is to change our strategies for coping with it.
Second Chances May 24, 2018
I recently decided to step back from a key relationship. I felt I’d tried and tried to make it work but every time we tried to be together I felt like I just got another slap in the face. The behaviour was unkind, and what was most hurtful was that it was intended. This had been going on for a few years, and it felt to me that the barbs slung my way always seemed unjustly and harshly critical.
The Role of Spirituality in Living a Happy Life Oct 9, 2017
I was recently asked what role spirituality plays in living a happy life. Whether we realize it or not, we are spiritual beings. That is, like all things seemingly physical and material, at the root core of our being, we are energy, and only energy. Quantum physics has proved this, it is no longer a matter for debate or speculation. What remains to be discovered, however, is the nature and source of that energy.
Seeing It All Differently Oct 2, 2017
I was once told that when I feel dispirited and a bit down on life, a good antidote is to make an effort to notice the abundance of natural beauty all around us. I was living in Northern California at the time and, to be honest, this was not a tough ask. I immediately immersed myself in magical glades of redwoods, sunsets over rolling surf, hummingbirds fluttering outside my window, beautiful cloud formations backgrounded by enormous blue skies, carpets of California poppies, - it seemed like I was literally surrounded in endless beauty.
Have We Had Enough Yet? Sep 26, 2017
Prior to writing his “Conversations With God” series Neil Donald Walsch hit rock bottom. He lost everything - his family, his job and his health - and was living in a one-man tent in a trailer park. He was mired in the depths of despair and desperation when one day “God,” or in other words, a voice from within, asked him the most critical question of his life: “Have you had enough?”
We Are Still Evolving Jul 26, 2017
When I was playing tennis recently I was mildly shocked by the ferociousness with which one of the other women would berate herself every time she missed a shot. We all have some level of negative self-talk running through our minds and so whilst I felt compassion for this woman who was so hard on herself, I also believe that such a constant and continual volley of attacks on our self-esteem, self-confidence and inner peace has a long-term debilitating effect.
The Nuances of Beauty Jun 2, 2017
I recently encountered a woman whose physical appearance momentarily shocked me. She had had so much plastic surgery that almost every feature of her face had been pumped up, tightened and stretched to the extreme that her appearance was disturbingly distorted. After my initial shock I then felt compassion for someone who seemed to hate herself so much that she would rather have almost any fake version of herself, no matter how extreme or unnatural, than reveal to the world her real self.
Plan B Nov 11, 2016
I had an unusual experience this week. On Monday night, election eve here in the United States, I was driving the freeway home. As I changed lanes my tire hit a pothole so hard I could feel it hit metal. I was momentarily surprised by this, it had never happened before even though I drive this particular route almost every day of the week. Yet there seemed to be no adverse consequences. I was home within five minutes and didn’t think about it again.
I was recently asked this question: My daughter is neither intelligent nor beautiful. How can I help her?
Bridging the Gulf with Namaste. May 16, 2016
I was at my sports club recently and as I passed a woman on my way to the locker room I smiled at her. Her facial expression remained emotionless and she averted her eyes as she moved past me. This is not the first time this has happened at the club and in the past such interactions have prompted me to look for rationalizations for the hurt I feel with each rejection and slight. Initially I came up with the notion that the club seems to draw from an upper middle class demographic who seem to be both superior and snooty.
Do We Really Have Free Will? Apr 24, 2016
People are often confused by free will. I was recently asked why God would bother to let us live in the illusion of free will if He ultimately knows the outcome already?
Saving Grace: The Unconditional Love of a Parent Apr 15, 2016
When Benjamin Franklin was sent as an envoy to France in 1776 he took his 9 year old grandson with him, extracting him from the loving arms of his parents in order that “If I die, I have a child to close my eyes.” Two years later Franklin sent the boy to boarding school in Geneva and did not see him for four years. When it became evident the boy was not thriving, Franklin wrote to him: “I shall always love you very much if you continue to be a good boy.” It is perhaps unsurprising the boy became “shy and indolent” and “fell into the funk of a depressed adolescent.”
The Myths and Misperceptions of Friendship Mar 18, 2016
The fundamental mistake we make in our friendships lies in our very understandings of what friendship is, leading to false expectations and misperceptions both in what we want and expect from our friends, as well as what we aim to both achieve and provide as a friend.